Wednesday, January 7, 2009

I'm done

Enough of this second guessing myself. I'm done with it.

My little girl is growing and thriving in all ways and I love it!

And I love her.

(She might even love me.)

I'm done feeling guilty about not doing things by the textbook. Seriously, when have I EVER done things exactly by the textbook??? This is me we're talking about here. I'm still Tara!

She'll be 4 weeks old on Saturday and I think I'm finally making progress... albeit slowly. I think I'm getting to know her, and I'm getting a little routine down and it feels so good. I'm feeling stronger - both physically AND mentally.

So guess what? I'm a good mom. Maybe even a damn good mom! I'm just not a perfect mom - but really, who is? And really, who would want to be? I thought I might want to be one, (or need to be one) but when I step back and look at the big picture - nope, I don't need to be perfect at this gig.

I'm done with trying to do everything exactly right. I'm going to continue doing my best and keep on going with my instincts. Because when I look at my beautiful Ruby I realize that that has been working just perfectly for us both thus far.

Time to give myself some slack and NOT take things so seriously.


areyoukiddingme said...

It's so difficult when you know you're just learning, but you just have to listen to the advice and discard anything that makes you feel bad/stupid/incompetent and anything that doesn't make sense. Is your baby happy and growing? Yes? Then you must be doing something right.

Emily said...

Good for you! If it feels righ, you're doing perfect! :) Screw the textbooks!

Anonymous said...

Hooray! Good for you!

Corney said...

Ah... Grasshopper... now you are beginning to see...

Love you

Sully said...

Thanks so much for writing this, because I am now at the doubting myself and my abilities point. This makes me feel a hell of a lot better. Good for you!

Candi B. said...

damn right lady!!!

Helene said...

I think you were being too hard on yourself. I am sure you are doing a wonderful job.
Take care!

Somewhat Ordinary said...

Glad to hear this from you!! You ARE doing a damn good job, girl and Ruby is LUCKY to have ya!