Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Eye Opener

I return to work in a week and a half. In preparation, I took Ruby to visit her daycare today to get her used to the place before she's there four days a week.

This is the daycare that I fell in love with, that was run by the nicest sweetest lady who is about my age and who was great with the kids. She was warm and friendly and I felt so good about taking Ruby there.

Well, she's still all that but it wasn't quite all fluff and love today. When she found out that Ruby still takes two naps a day she advised me that that was soon to stop because all her daycare kids nap at the same time - noon. No exceptions.

She also lectured me a bit about Ruby's eating habits when I told her Ruby doesn't eat much. I told her the doctor said it was nothing to worry about and she told me that yeah, doctors will say that. But that I needed to keep offering her different foods or else she would one day be nine and only eat 10 things like her friend's kid. Except that I do offer her different foods. And she eats them. Just only a few bites and then she's bored with it or uninterested or whatever. It's not that she doesn't like the food - so don't go making assumptions. Thank you.

She also has a big fluffy dog that wasn't present when I went to view the daycare the first two times. I mean, I'm totally ok with Ruby being around a dog - in fact I'd like her to grow up around animals, it's just that he was laying in the middle of the room, amongst the toys and he smelled a little bit doggy. I could see that he's obviously fantastic with kids and I have no worries about Ruby's safety, it's just that... he's a big, fluffy, slightly smelly dog, laying in the middle of the toys... I don't know. I just didn't know he was part of the package.

Oh, and when I left she gave me a calendar for the month of December noting all the days that the daycare is closed. What the fuck am I supposed to do on those days? Seriously. What do people do? I'm totally new to this.

I know that all of this is pretty minor stuff and I still feel good about the daycare. I think I was just a little bit sensitive going in. I thought I would be totally ok with it because I feel ready and I think Ruby is ready, but I started getting a bit fluttery in the chest and I got tears in my eyes a couple of times, thinking about the adjustments we are going to make. And so with the nap comment and the eating comments... just... bah.

On the bright side, Ruby really seemed to like it there. She was interested in the other kids and she liked the different toys and she was all chatty and moving around the room and probably forgot that dear old Mom was even there at all.

We go back next week for another visit before she starts going full time on December 8th. I can see that this is not going to be as easy as I thought or hoped it would be. I'm a big fucking sensitive wuss right now.


Just Jen said...

I can totally relate because I feel the same way.

I know that socially Hudson will fit in just fine, but I am struggling with the small things...

I am his Mom and I know what he likes, and what he doesn't like. It will take time for them to figure him out.

He is a very picky eater and I would assume that they will not be making him grilled cheese every day because that's what he likes. I do, when nothing else gets eaten and ends up being pushed away. I hope that he will watch the other kids and eat what they eat.

I also feel bad that he too still takes 2 naps a day as well, and they have nap time from 12-2 and that's it. One a day. We are not big in the get-up-and-go in the mornings, and for him to be there for 8:30 is going to be hard to make it on one nap-- mid day.

I saw that he fit in well yesterday, but can't help but hope that he will adapt quicker than Mom will with the big adjustment.

I wish I could simply win the lottery and stay home and raise my kid(s).

Mommy Shoes said...

Leaving Z at daycare for two days a week is the hardest thing I have to do. When I go to full-time in January I am going to be a wreck. it is very common for kids their age to be taking two naps. In fact, at Z's daycare, they have them in two naps until 16 months. As far as eating. I highly recommend checking out A serving for toddlers is equal to one tablespoon per year of age.

If it makes you feel any better, Z does eat a lot better at daycare. I imagine it's because it's what all the kids are doing.

Hang in there! This is very hard. And it's going to get harder before it gets easier.

Alicia said...

Ellie is still a picky eater at home, but she eats a lot more at daycare (which kinda pisses me off, but in the end I'm happy b/c at least she's eating). The same may go for Ruby. The lecture though... nah ah. That's uncalled for and unprofessional.

There's a dog at our daycare, but she's not allowed to hang around the kids. Is the dog down in the daycare area all the time? That's a little strange.

As for all the days the provider needs off (especially in December), that's what I use almost all of my vacation time for. It sucks but it's a necessary evil. My provider takes 2 weeks off during the year and a couple of days here and there, but she lets me know at the very beginning of the year. Here in the states, your employer cannot deny you that time off because it's for childcare. Period. Not sure how it is in Canada.

As for 1 nap a day, Ellie transitioned herself at 1 year old. All the kids take a nap from 1-3, but my provider has NEVER told a mother a child can have only one nap. That's a little strange, I'll admit. Most babies up until the age of 18 months or so take 2 naps, one at around 10 and the other around 1:30 or so, right? I just find it weird that she would insist the child only take one nap. Maybe it'll work for Ruby. A trial run at home might not be a bad idea.

It's really hard, I know. But it does get easier. I had to leave Ellie in daycare at 11 weeks old. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I totally understand the trepidation.

Best of luck, Tara.

JJ Keith said...

Ugh. Daycare can be so frustrating. For me it was the first time that someone besides my husband and I got to know our daughter and at first I was totally irked by their comments about her demeanor. They told me she had "attitude"! I was so annoyed. But over the last few months I've gotten to know them and they've grown attached to Bea. I now feel pretty good about the arrangement... just in time for me to pull her back out again because the semester is about over. I bet the same will happen to you: as soon as you and Ruby get into the flow of daycare Junior will appear. Oh well, such is left, eh?

Just take it in stride and try to get used to the idea of not being 100% in control of Ruby's days anymore. I found it a frustrating adjustment to make, but it gets easier.