Sunday, February 15, 2009

Visit

I particularly love it when an old girlfriend sends many, many, many emails, text messages and phone messages saying that she really NEEDS to come over to see Baby Ruby. She can't wait to meet Baby Ruby. She would love to visit with Baby Ruby.

And then after two or three cancellations, she is finally able to make it over to my house for a visit. And as soon as she walks through the door she gives me the once over - as if to assess my post pregnancy figure, clothing and hairstyle. She then proceeds to scratch Ruby's belly with her long, talon-like, jewel adorned acrylic nails (not unlike how she greets Quincy) and says, "Awww... Aren't you cute." She then sits on my couch for three hours and acts completely oblivious of Ruby while she talks incessantly about the Mediterranean cruise that she's going on in a few days. And then before she leaves she scolds me about my use of the eff word and tells me that if I don't cut back on it now, Ruby will grow up to have a foul mouth. She then slips back into her 6" stiletto heels and drives away in her black convertible.

Those are just my absolute favorite kinds of visits.

9 comments:

Emily said...

Woh.

nancy said...

Can you HEAR my eyes rolling all the way from Colorado?

~puke~

I curse like a sailor. Each child has said it one time and now it's nothing "new" to them. I can promise you my kids will curse LESS than the ones who are never cursed around.

Spacey said...

Whaaaaa? **shakes head**

noswimmers said...

Woah...that's a whole new level of bitch.
Yuck.

Aurelia said...

Ughhh, just wait til she has a kid. hehe....she is sooooo in for a shock.

Emily said...

Hahahahahahaha. There's def something to be said for friends still wearing their maternity clothes a year later and who smell like puke!

Tobacco Brunette said...

With friends like that....

How obnoxious!

Happy two months to Ruby!!

Femme au Foyer said...

I know exactly how you feel about people sizing up your post pregnancy figure. I get a lot of that myself and it never fails to aggravate me. What is with people?

Somewhat Ordinary said...

Someone said just wait until she has kids - I just gotta say hopefully she doesn't! Hey, at least she came to visit - I have one friend that lives in the same town that is still saying "Gosh, I really need to meet Mason." Gee, considering he will be 1 next month maybe we'll be graced with a meeting by the time he graduates high school!