Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Some support, some cruelty

Our families now know.

We told them at a dinner party at my BIL and SIL's house on Saturday night. (Well, I told my mom last week and told my dad before we left for dinner.) Everyone was ecstatic. People were laughing and crying and hugging and kissing and it all felt very good.

Until we were later seated at the dinner table and my SIL asked if I wanted whipped cream on my pie. I said no because I really didn't want to gain 68lbs again, like I did with Ruby. And my MIL pipes up and says, "THAT'S HOW MUCH YOU GAINED!!!???" I said, "yes..." And he looked at me like I just told her I once murdered someone for twenty dollars. She raised her eyebrows and made a face of complete disgust and said, "Jeeeez..."

The room fell silent. My jaw dropped. I was so embarrassed and hurt. Nobody said a word. I just looked away and shook my head and said, "Unbelievable". (This from a woman living in a glass house, throwing those kinds of stones...)

Discomfort for all followed. My night was ruined. I was pissed that nobody stood up to her (including myself). Steve hugged me and said, "You looked beautiful when you were pregnant." Unfortunately not loud enough for her to hear.

I did write a post about it on my other blog, knowing that she reads/stalks that blog obsessively. It may have been a childish way to deal with the situation but it did bring me some satisfaction and comfort. I tried to do it as tactfully as possible. Whatever, it's not like anybody in this family is interested in dealing with these sort of things in an adult manner. I would know - I've tried going that route in the past with zero success.

Why she would choose a time like that to go for the jugular, I'll never know. I don't know what is wrong with her. She's an ignorant bitch and every time she does something like this, it just causes more and more permanent damage. I'll never forget the things she's said and done to me. This was a big one.

On the bright side of things - I'm pleased that my family is so happy and excited for us. I don't know why but I somehow expected a negative reaction.


Alicia said...

Um, most of the women I know gained like 60 lbs or so during pregnancy. That's not unusual.

Screw her.

I've seen pictures of you pregnant. You were, indeed, beautiful. You ARE beautiful. Don't let her ruin this for you (I know, easier said than done).

Some people just NEED to be cruel. They get off on it. And no matter how many times it happens, it still hurts all the same.

Again, screw her.

annacyclopedia said...

Ugh. That just completely sucks, Tara. Sorry she just wrecked the moment like that. Screw her, indeed.

Although you did make me laugh with your line about murdering someone for 20 bucks. You rock.

Candi said...

umm...really? its kinda sad that that's all she has to make you feel bad. people can be overly ridiculous when they get jealous, can't they??

Aurelia said...

People like that--are just not worth talking too. I'm kind of surprised that no one else at the table said anything to her though?

Like nothing?

At our house, they might just change the subject at the time and then later take them aside and tell the person off.

Then again, that's hardly satisfying!

Emily said...

What a horrible thing to say. Some people are just plain stupid. I'm sorry you had to hear that, especially on a night you were sharing your good news.

JJ said...

I'm still fuming for you..I read the other post yesterday and GO YOU for putting it out there for her to read. What a crappy thing to say to someone and you were and are one HOT MOMMA!