Wednesday, August 5, 2009

I've met someone new

Let it be known that after 14 months of searching, I have finally found myself a family doctor. Back in June 2008 my family doctor closed his practice to pursue internal medicine and I was left pregnant with nobody to look after me.

Well... not really. I already had a midwife at that point in time and she looked after me for all things pregnancy related and she also cared for Ruby until Ruby was 8 weeks old and then we were discharged from her care.

So we've been without care for almost 8 months now. And up until today Ruby has never seen a doctor. (Except for that time she had her vomiting spell and I freaked out and rushed her to emergency, like the rookie mom that I was/am). To be clear, Ruby has had all her immunizations done by the health nurse at the local health unit. And I did go to that mommy/baby group up until Ruby was 6 months old and there were always nurses around that so if I did have any questions they were able to answer. And luckily Ruby has not really ever had a need to see a doctor.

It is damn hard to find a doctor who is willing to take new patients here. I would know, I've spent 8-14 months looking for one. I called every single doctor in my city asking if they would take new patients and they all said NO. So when I got a lead on a new doctor starting up at my old clinic, I pounced.

I went in to see him yesterday under the guise of having a mole checked out (I was pretty sure the mole was normal), just so I would have an excuse to see him and feel things out to see if he was decent. He seemed decent enough so I mentioned my almost 8 month old daughter who had never been to the doctor... his jaw dropped and I had to clarify that we had a midwife, she's had her shots and she's never had a reason to see a doctor. He said to bring her in and he'd give her a checkup.

So that's what we did this morning. And my new doctor? He rocks. I know it's only been two dates visits but I think I'm in love.

Why?

Well, he did a kickass thorough job of examining Ruby.

But also? He was extremely sensitive and sympathetic when he found out how Ruby was conceived.

He asked if I was going to have any more babies. I said, "Well. We did IVF to have her, so.... I guess if I were ever to come up with $10,000 again, I might try..."

He put down his pen and his face softened and he started asking questions. But not dumb questions. He had educated, intelligent and sympathetic questions.

Oh you might think that educated, intelligent and sympathetic questions should/would be the norm for a physician - but anyone who has battled infertility knows that this is not the standard. Even my previous family doctor - whom I really liked - seemed to have very little knowledge of IF/IVF and it kind of really annoyed me.

But this doctor? He knows about it.

He told me he has friends who did it 3 times and then went to New York where they paid $30,000 for more procedures and still it didn't work for them. He said he feels just terrible for them. He asked if I went to PCRM, which I did. He said that he thinks the doctors there are really great guys. (He knows them??!!) He asked what our diagnosis was and if we tried IUI's first (He knows what an IUI is??!!). When I told him we went straight to IVF/ICSI and that it actually didn't work the first time, he shook his head and said, "Oh my gosh, so it was actually $20,000 then..."

And then he smiled at Ruby and said, "Well, you've got something to really be happy for right there."

It was at that point that I had to consciously stop myself from throwing my arms around him and giving him a big fat kiss on the lips.

He's a keeper.

58 comments:

Julia said...

Wow, I'm jealous. Does have a brother? A sister for that matter. I could go both ways... haha.

annacyclopedia said...

That is so great, Tara! Having a doctor you can trust is so huge - I found mine years ago when I had to be treated for a, um, female problem and if he ever leaves, I will be devastated. He's awesome and it makes such a difference knowing that someone will tell you the truth but be kind about it.

So glad for you and Ruby!

planningdoesntwork said...

I found a new doctor a couple of months ago and she is awesome too. It makes a huge difference, mostly because I was used to doctors who talked down to me making me feel stupid for asking questions. This doctor treats me like an intelligent person.

It's so nice to find a good one.

Alicia said...

That is so very wonderful. We have an excellent PED, but I know they're hard to find. He wasn't the original doctor we chose from that specific practice; he was the one on call when Ellie went to the hospital with possible pneumonia at 2 months. He helped me through the worst night/day of my life. It's doctors like that, that care about the entire family's well-being that you latch onto with both hands. Sounds like your new doc is one of the good guys.

noswimmers said...

WOW...that is rare!! Definitely a keeper. It was worth the 8 month wait, I guess.

:)

Aurelia said...

A doctor who really cares and listens? Yeah, a keeper. A real one.

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