After a couple of days of lower back, tummy and leg aches – which would normally indicate an oncoming period, I had a little bit of bleeding on Sunday morning. I figured I knew the explanation for the bleeding (sex) but since it’s never happened before I thought I should call it in.
Lucky for me, my favorite midwife was on call and she asked me to explain everything that had happened over the past week – then she asked me to meet her at the hospital for an assessment. This time I got to completely bypass the dreaded ER and head straight to L&D.
My mom made the 45 minute drive to come and look after Ruby while we were out (she then went on to tidy my kitchen and cook me dinner) which I felt totally guilty about, which is probably stupid.
The assessment revealed that the bleeding was from a very sensitive cervix getting “poked” (midwife’s choice of words, not mine). She also said that because my pregnancies were so close together and also that I had ligament problems with my first one – my pelvic floor is hanging like a hammock (nice visual). And that my body didn’t get enough time to recover properly between pregnancies. Because of this there is a lot more aches and pains than usual – and everything is magnified. (Also explains why I pee my pants a little bit every day).
I also brought up the gym since it seems that nobody in my family (Steve and my parents) agrees with the frequency that I go there or how fatigued I am afterwards. I thought I would settle it once and for all and prove to everyone that I was right and they were wrong (my favorite), except it didn't exactly work out in my favor... The midwife asked what I do and for how long and was horrified when I told her. Apparently I should NOT being going 3-4 times a week and doing 45 minutes of cardio each time, sweating my ass off and getting my heart rate up between 150-160bpm. She said that if I want to keep going that I should be going 2-3 times a week, NOT getting to the point of being breathless/sweaty and not allowing my heart rate to go over 120bpm. Well what’s the fucking point then?
I could almost cry over that one. While the gym didn’t make my body feel overly great (nay, it made my body huuuuurt), I did get a high from it and it helped release my stress like nothing else. I also had the notion that I was doing my future self a big favour and getting a jump on my post baby recovery. Instead I was *contributing to the physical problems that my body is having with this pregnancy.
I brought up my worries about weight gain and how I was trying to prevent gaining 68lbs like I did with Ruby. She asked how much I’d gained so far and when I told her 22lbs, she was impressed and said that at this point that’s good. She said I could gain another 20 and it would still be perfectly ok. That made me feel a little better anyways.
She suggested that I’m doing too much and trying to keep on top (in control) of everything. She advised that I slow down a bit and try to enjoy my life, my family and the rest of this pregnancy. I’m not to worry so much about everything. Let some things go. That’s hard but I will do it if it will make my body feel better. (Not sure what’s going to happen to my mind or my self esteem.)
She strongly advised that I get some acupuncture which I know I said I was going to do before and never got around to it but this time I really will.
She suggested that I go for physiotherapy for my weak pelvic floor. Apparently there are therapists who specialize in pelvic floor recovery. I will start with the acupuncture first.
She asked me to take a couple of weeks off work to rest and get feeling better but I vetoed that.
After all was said and done, I felt better that I had been properly checked over and the baby is ok and so am I. I have an explanation/diagnosis for my more-than-normal discomfort. I have a bit of direction as to what I can and cannot do (even if it sucks).
I have to remind myself that this isn’t forever – in the grand scheme it’s just a small pocket of my life and I need to try to suck it up, make the best of it and try to make it as tolerable as possible.
*I know lots of people exercise lots when they’re pregnant and I’m not saying anything about that. This is about me and my individual case.
4 comments:
Would it be terribly offensive for me, a stranger from the internet, to say that I'm really glad for what your midwife said? You're not heavy! You're not gaining much weight at all! You deserve to relax a little and not exacerbate your muscle aches. You're beautiful, you're going to have two beautiful babies soon, and from all the way over in California, I'm pulling for you to get to kick back and get excited about all the awesomeness to come.
Genial dispatch and this mail helped me alot in my college assignement. Thanks you for your information.
Yet another stranger on the internet weighing in. I am a women's health and I can't stress enough the importance of learning how to strengthen your pelvic floor with 2 step Kegel that includes squeezing and elevating your pelvic floor muscles. A local women's health physical therapist can get you started on the right track, teaching you about posture and the other supportive muscles of your lumbo-pelvic basket. Starting now can help your recovery after delivery!
I really get the disappointment of them wanting you to slow down with the gym, cuz that's something I worried someone would say to me. Yea, I'd have been willing to do it if it meant keeping D safe, but it still would've been hard cuz like you, it helped with my stress, and my body image. I know nothing about your pelvic floor or body though so can't really comment on your body's needs compared to what they're saying. Hang in there. I think you're looking great in your pics:-)
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