tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post7791541287092400139..comments2023-10-22T06:21:42.820-07:00Comments on A Run For My Money: The end is nearTarahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18384206429432741119noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-87230706038304177562011-02-17T12:01:35.987-08:002011-02-17T12:01:35.987-08:00I'm so sorry Tara - its all happened so incred...I'm so sorry Tara - its all happened so incredibly fast your heart must be working overtime to keep up.<br /><br />I think sometimes its easier on the dying to know that the ones they love most in the world don't have to actually watch them die. You've said your goodbyes and he knows how much you love his son and grandchildren. He knows your strength and the incredibly high level of caring you are capable of. <br /><br />I'm sure your soup will be much needed as will your strength but please know that we are all alongside for YOU - and if you need anything - especially a place to vent - we're here for you! xoxoThe_EmilyBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09518701459742284875noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-7481778559533444422011-02-15T22:01:07.989-08:002011-02-15T22:01:07.989-08:00I didn't comment on your last post, sorry. Re...I didn't comment on your last post, sorry. Regarding that post, you are not evil. You have valid feelings and emotions. You have a household to care for, and 'milking it' is not cool at all... That being said, being through what I went through I can give you the other perspective. I was not in control of my shit when my dad died. I really don't even remember much of it, I think I blocked it out. I do know that *reality* was not something I had a concept for. It did get better, but honestly? He didn't need to be so extreme, and you also need to be there foe him (which I know you already are). It's FUCKING HARD when someone dies, I know you are going through some of the grief right now, so you understand... it's profoundly hard. Mind fucking hard. You both just need to hang onto each other for dear life and forgive one another of things you might do that are very out of character.<br /><br />About what's happening right now. I am so sorry. You're right, he should not be alone. I relly hope his wife will want to be with him. Maybe right now it's hard for her to think about that, but better to be with him then regret it later. I hope that you & S will have another chance to say goodbye. I know it sucked for the kids not to say goodbye the last time, but I know that in your father-in-law's own way, he already said goodbye annd had his special moments with them. <br /><br />Just my opinion, but I really hope S or his mom will be there. They won't regret it later. As horrible and as sad as it is, it is a last moment that will hold so much love, peace, but also ache and loss. <br /><br />I wish you all strength and peace during this time. <br /><br />Hugs....Emilyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14494920071338607649noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-49573389667880965802011-02-14T19:05:42.519-08:002011-02-14T19:05:42.519-08:00Oh Tara, I am so very sad while reading this. I d...Oh Tara, I am so very sad while reading this. I do not have any words of encouragement, but just know that we love you guys and think of you non-stop. Huge hugs. XOJust Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13087586602202480628noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-60045817129802391112011-02-14T18:08:11.964-08:002011-02-14T18:08:11.964-08:00My dad passed away from brain cancer 2 years ago a...My dad passed away from brain cancer 2 years ago and he did just that, waited until my mother left and his sister was there and quietly passed on. It was very peaceful. It was hard on my mom and my brother and I to accept that we weren't there, but I too feel that it was his choice to go then. Remember that hearing is one of the last things to go..he's proving that by squeezing your hands and waving his fingers. My dad listened to my youngest daughter on my cell phone the night before he passed. He couldn't interact in any way- he wasn't opening his eyes but when I asked him to squeeze my hand if he could hear her on the phone, he squeezed very tightly. My thoughts are with you and your family.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-58197761543177309042011-02-14T14:38:57.716-08:002011-02-14T14:38:57.716-08:00I'm so sorry that this has to happen. It is ha...I'm so sorry that this has to happen. It is hard.<br />And to be yet another person to add to what the previous three commenters said, the two of my grandparents who passed away over the past few years also waited until family had left.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-1971284176254107672011-02-14T10:38:25.126-08:002011-02-14T10:38:25.126-08:00I am so, so sorry, Tara. It is all so shockingly q...I am so, so sorry, Tara. It is all so shockingly quick. I hope if he is alone when he passes that you don't feel guilt about it. My friend's father passed recently and they were there non-stop. They knew it was going to happen any minute so she and her brother sat in silence all day. They got distracted by an employee (they run a business) and were busy talking about it-no longer sitting in silence. After the conversation was over they realized he had passed. It was like he wanted to be alone and since they wouldn't leave the room he took the opportunity when they were busy talking.<br /><br />Again, I'm so sad for you.Somewhat Ordinaryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09701338805685025735noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-63391392566397559152011-02-14T10:33:03.936-08:002011-02-14T10:33:03.936-08:00My husband's great aunt recently passed away, ...My husband's great aunt recently passed away, and it was similar to what babyinterrupted said. Despite the fact that they had an around the clock rotation of people to sit with her, she died when her daughter left the room to use the ladies room. <br /><br />Either way, there's not much I can say to ease the Suck of losing someone you love. I am sending you virtual hugs, sweetie.<br /><br />xoxoSerenityhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17765237663006604157noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-81988793107153164542011-02-14T10:24:18.353-08:002011-02-14T10:24:18.353-08:00sorry: "around a lot of" (skipped that, ...sorry: "around a lot of" (skipped that, somehow)babyinterruptedhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09691284568281459525noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2221819811860290504.post-30353681037035860382011-02-14T10:23:50.889-08:002011-02-14T10:23:50.889-08:00I'm so sorry. What very hard days.
I don'...I'm so sorry. What very hard days.<br /><br />I don't know if this helps or not, but I've been around of people who are dying (part of my job) and have found that they often die when their loved ones leave. Somehow, they seem to wait. Naturally, nobody knows why this is, but it happens a lot. So if he dies when no one is there, don't feel guilty about him being alone - he may, in some way, choose that.babyinterruptedhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09691284568281459525noreply@blogger.com